On STD Travel

To be fair, I’ve seen some pretty odd named vehicles over the years. Way back in the ‘70’s (and long B4 SMS lingo), Chevy was selling the Luv. This was in fact a truck. Well, a Light Utility Vehicle anyway. And while Grunge was all the rage in the pubs during the early to mid 90’s, Nissan had the delightfully bounding name of Prairie Joy ... which was about the only upbeat thing about the minivan that had more in common with a doorstop that a motor vehicle.

Now I’m not sure if Fiat are still making their Panda, or Suzuki still flog their Cappuccino … but the cars here on The Island are definitely bearing monikers from the same Happy Hello Kitty marketing company. Even the 3 year old boy (when he is not channeling Ben Tennyson or Humungosaur) can play along with Dad on the “match the Sing Sing name to the Aussie model” game. And the names are special ... so the Nissan Pulsar is a Nissan “Sunny”. And Toyota’s minivan is the “Wish” ... and you’d probably like to make just that if you owned the pimped out one that cruises the neighborhood (who pimps out a minivan?). Then there is Renault’s Kangoo ... What is that all about? They couldn’t afford the extra syllable?

The commercial vehicles have gone for names a little less on the cheery side and a lot more on the practicality side: the Nissan Cabster (yep. it's a dual cab.), the Peugeot Partner, the Renault Trafic (now we can't even afford the extra letter?), the Suzuki Carry ... and yet there is the Fiat Doblo. I suppose Diablo may not have sold well given all of the invisible friends that are paid homage here on The Island.

This brings me to the fact that we have caved in. We will be purchasing a vehicle for my Maid. Don’t get me started on how many GQ Patrols I could have purchased for the same amount of Pesos. The lead to coin ratio is way out of whack when it comes to car sales here on The Island.

But you can all rest easy knowing that I will continue to pay my penance for lugging a two ton jalopy across metropolitan Sydney for 13 years, as I remain a public transport rube. Meanwhile, back on Wisteria Lane, the Maid will be setting off to Bambino’s and Happy Hour at the Pool in fine style … in her second hand Nissan Syphilis.